Birdie Feelings :)

I have procrastinated teaching my birds feelings for solidly six months. It felt presumptuous - how can I tell them how they feel? I don't know what birdie feelings feel like. What if I mislabel their feelings, and confuse them? Finally - and this seemed worst - what if I create through language a narrative of their experience, and alter their experience, not for the better? Language is a powerful tool - we become the things we tell ourselves we are. Inner dialog is an extremely powerful tool; language shapes the context and interpretation of our experiences. It shapes us and creates and recreates us.

For instance, what if I say, "Ellie feels mad" when she's got slitty eyes and is shouting because she's been left behind in the bathroom? But she's not really mad? And now I've labeled something that isn't true - but as she learns what 'mad' means (in other contexts), it would become true, through verbal association?

I could have a cockatoo who isn't mad, but because I label the behavior in that and other situations, she adapts anger into that context.

So feeling labels seemed, to me, a scary thing--not just in complexity of teaching them, but in consequence, as well. I'm a very productive procrastinator, so we've learned a lot of other things instead!

Yet feelings are part of their lives. Every single day, Isabelle feels frightened at some point - she is a sensitive bird, and quick or sudden movements surprise and frighten her. Passing a formerly benign object can suddenly be a source of fear. Every night Ellie resists bedtime, and I have done everything I could think of to ease her nighttime discomfort - including a few times sleeping in their room, always responding to her nighttime calls to check on her, giving her treats and cuddles before bed. I even ask her if she wants to sleep with the light on or off. When scared from fireworks - she wants the lights on; otherwise she requests the lights to be turned off. There is some light in their room, always at night, from the outside lighting.

Emotions are part of their lives, and it seemed if they have the capacity for communication, NOT giving them the tools to label and express their emotions may be the greater cruelty.

So. Feelings.

I have lightly tried to create associations between my observations of their states and their possible feelings - capturing the 'feeling' state through context, not directly teaching them. It has been too inconsistent to really get anywhere. The other night I took a deep breath and decided to tackle it.

I began with vocabulary. Scientists have labeled five basic emotions: surprise, happy, sad, anger, afraid. (My labels: excited, happy, sad, mad, afraid.) So the birds learned the words - and they were both so excited to be working on a new and challenging project :)

My plan was to tell them my feeling states, to avoid the 'presumption' issue. I'd tell them how I felt under certain circumstance in their working and known vocabulary. Then I'd see if they could extrapolate from my feeling states and apply it to themselves.
Mom feels happy when Ellie and Mom outside.
Mom feels happy when Ellie and Mom eat pancakes.
Mom feels happy when Ellie and Mom learn.
Mom feels happy when Ellie and Mom read book.
Mom feels sad when Mom works too much.
Mom feels sad when Mom is gone.
Mom feels excited when Grandma visit.
etc.

After this exercise they could correctly identify my 'feeling' states. Their answers to their own feeling states under those conditions were getting there - but they were still confused. So, labels.

I decided I should try to label their feelings to give us all a starting point. Maybe I would be wrong in my interpretations - but it really did feel unfair to not teach them to express their feelings. We needed to start somewhere--I figured I'd do clear and obvious ones. I would tell them a vocabulary word that seemed correlated with a feeling state, and label it.

• When Ellie eats treat, Ellie is happy.
• When Ellie in shower, Ellie is happy.
• When Ellie outside, Ellie is happy.

The negative emotions were more complicated.

• When Mom gone, Ellie is sad. (Is Ellie sad? She is always withdrawn for a few days when I return from vacation. But who knows.)
• When Mom works too much, Ellie is sad. (Not just normal workdays - but super long ones, when she has babysitters play with her instead--and then is usually somewhat withdrawn again.) 

I still felt the language labels were imprecise, so thought I'd give her an example, and brought out my suitcase. "Mom gone," I said. "Ellie feels sad." And I held up the "sad" label.

I thought the pairing would be instructive--and after that, she clearly labeled happy, excited, and sad. That was enough for one lesson, and she got a jackpot of treats to cheer her back up :)

With Isabelle - who would be terrified of my suitcase - we worked on happy, excited, sad - all generally - and then I used afraid in context too - showing her from across the room an object that is mildly scary (a paper tube). We labeled the feelings - and she actually learned faster and with better accuracy than Ellie. We aren't done learning the labels - we need to clarify and sharpen them in context and in lessons, but some interesting things have come out of our feeling conversations.

For one, my birds don't like each other - which I already knew. But almost every day we sit together - one on my shoulder, the other on my lap, and I figured hanging out outweighed the dislike factor. But when I asked each of them, "How do you feel?" they both picked "sad". That was a surprise - so I separated them as we spend time together - and now they both tell me they are "happy" when we sit together.

Their labels are also very consistent. Perhaps the biggest surprise was a 'conversation' I had with Ellie before bed. I put her on the playstand in her room and asked, "How do you feel?" while holding up the "happy" and "sad" cards. Her feet were tense, her feathers flat, her eyes scanning sharply from place to place throughout the room, and she was stressed - as she often is at bedtime. She literally doesn't like bedtime, and I just can't figure out how to fix it, even after five years of trying.

She picked "sad".

Me: Do you feel sad, or afraid? (Holding up both cards)
Ellie: Afraid
Me: Do you feel afraid, or mad?
Ellie: Afraid.
Me: Do you feel afraid of Isabelle? (I sometimes wondered.)
Ellie: No.
Me: Do you feel afraid of the lightning? (I could see it in the distance - and so could she, through the window.)
Ellie: Yes.
Me, just to confirm: Do you feel afraid of Isabelle?
Ellie: No.
Me: Do you feel afraid of the lightning?
Ellie: Yes.

So I got a blanket and put it over the window, and then made a towel fort around a cage. She doesn't really go in there much, but I hid some treats. She looked at the curtain, and I labeled it, "Curtain" for her, and had her touch it. Then she hopped into the cage to look for treats (less stressed now), and ambled out to investigate the curtain again.
Me: Are you happy?
Ellie: Yes
Me: Are you afraid?
Ellie: Yes
Me: Which are you more? (holding up both)
Ellie: Happy.

And from my visual inspection, she seemed infinitely less stressed - her feet were no longer tense, her eyes were no longer scanning, and her feathers weren't flattened. She moseyed off to look for more treats, seeming content with the arrival of the curtain and the towel fort.

So - labels, I think, are improving their quality of life. But it's still strange and feels presumptuous (and a little scary) to teach feelings. It's not 100% there - and also seems like a ouija board, but... we're getting there! And if nothing comes of it - we're connecting, interacting, and spending time together, and there's no harm in that! :)

Here's a video of our feeling training session. After the tube - she really labeled her feelings so much better. (I feel so terrible for showing it to her, still! GAH!)

Bigger Bird Choices - Making Progress in Consent

Consent is the idea that we have control over the things that happen to us. I consent to go out with Joe on a date; I consent to hugging people; I consent to work; I consent to visit with my friends and family. I consent to the way people treat me - or I have the option of leaving them out of my life.

In the animal world, it can be a real struggle to get an animal's approval and consent - really, we can only tell by body language, and sometimes that is tough to decipher. I was at a plaza a few weeks ago, and a man had his large puppy on a choke-collar. Certainly the dog was not 'consenting' to be choked every time he moved away from the man. Many birds are 'forced' into their cages when it's time to be put away. They don't 'consent' to go in their cages. Often, birds also don't consent to be touched or held by strangers - they're just small and it's easy to force them to do stuff.

Humans in prison don't have as many opportunities for consent - they are forced into cells as well - but usually because their rights haven't been taken away from them. Pets are born into a world with little 'consent' (even as much as we love them). They are born into a world where we force them into travel carriers or into the bath, where we pick them up and carry them into their little pens or cages. (Or they know they have no choice, so they go in 'voluntarily', wishing not to be touched and forced.)

The 'force free' movement is largely based on training animals (through Applied Behavioral Analysis/clicker training) to behave in certain ways so that they are set up to 'consent' to activities and interactions. I largely try to practice this - Isabelle goes into her cage because she 'consents' to do so - there are lots of treats and fresh toys in there, and she's curious and excited to see what she'll find. Ellie 'consents' to step onto her play stand through force free principles, because I've trained her to with a treat. Some people have trained their pets to comfortably and voluntarily go into carriers - and some have even trained them to go through vet visits (and get shots) on a voluntary, force-free basis! I will be the first to say I am not perfect, but I try very hard to adhere to this standard.

So - force-free trained pets are much, much happier pets!

Force-free, however, hasn't, I think, had the opportunity yet to address matters of free will. Humans still make the major choices for our pets, and then we train them to be comfortable with those choices--to voluntarily engage in them. I have always clipped my birds' wings because I have friends who have lost their birds through accidents - collisions with windows and fans, flying out of an accidentally-opened door. My birds appear to experience no distress during a clipping - and afterwards they get treats and then hop along on their way to the next fun activity.

I also choose to allow my birds--with their wings clipped and on non-breezy days--to sit with me in the garden, playing in the hose, or just watching butterflies. "Outside" is our vocabulary word for this - and it's their favorite activity, period. (I am constantly scanning the sky for predators, and we go inside if there is any threat. I understand that this is a controversial choice, but it is what it is.)

And I make this choice - they are allowed outside--there is some risk involved--and I clip their wings.

This week It Was Time again. Ellie's wings were getting longer, and I found the proud stinker everywhere - on top of doors, and across the room. It always makes me sad to clip their wings. I wish they could safely fly, but they love being outside with me, and--for me, at this point--being able to fly outside isn't an option. But I thought, "What if I could let her choose to either learn to fly or to have clipped wings and go outside?"

I never think these things are going to work - she's a bird, how could she understand the gravity of choosing clipped wings and going outside, or learning to fly, and being inside? But she's surprised me often enough that now I record our interactions, just in case!

One more word about consent - it is possible to consent, not knowing what one is consenting to. Isabelle can choose to go into her cage because it is fun, but is she really consenting to be in her cage for the following eight hours? So consent and informed consent are two vastly different things. The force-free/ABA model I think largely addresses 'consent' - the animal goes in the carrier, but is the animal really consenting to go to the vet? (Can the animal be given this health choice? Do they have the capacity to understand it?)

For the wing-clipping vs. flight issue with Ellie, I felt that a reminder of vocabulary terms combined with her past experience would make her consent more of the informed nature. As a baby, she learned to fly - and she flew for many months (maybe even a year). She also experiences clippings - she (one would assume, since she's a bright bird) understands that after a clip, she is no longer able to fly as far as she had before the clip.

So - I had her recall-fly to me a few times - and I told her "fly," so that she would understand the vocabulary word fly was linked to that behavior and ability. Then I brought out scissors and pretended to clip her wings. I said, "Clip wings!" several times so that she could have the opportunity to link the action with the knowledge of the consequence - clipped wings.

Then I created flash card sentences for her to read - "If Ellie fly, Ellie no go outside" and "If Ellie fly outside, Ellie could get hurt." I had her read them silently (I wasn't trying hard not to cue her - it wasn't a reading test - just trying to help her understand.) Then I had her choose the one I was reading.

Then I created flash cards that said, "Clipped wings = outside" and "Fly = inside" and paired the concept as well.

Then I asked her these questions and it was so interesting!!! :)

Here's the longer training video!

Conversations with Ellie: Testing and Tattling

Last weekend's tests weren't as successful as I'd hoped, although we had a limited (but good) data set. I've tried working with Ellie a few more times on the Consonant-Vowel-Consonant (CVC) cards, nothing. Just to be clear: testing is on her terms, and her indication of no is like my asking if she wants some spinach, and finding myself snubbed.

We had a conversation last night about her tests. I had been gone since the day before, and the neighbor, Parker, took care of them and played with them. She was eager to work together last night, since we hadn't had lessons in a few days. That said, the CVC test is very simple, and Ellie doesn't like simple things. If I offer to work with her on a tough book (with fewer treats) or an easy one (with consequently more treats), she will pick the tougher book.

So I taught her the phrase "CVC", paired it with her test cards, and then held up the "Talk?" flashcard. She picked "Yes". The following conversation ensued, and I figured I'd start with one of her favorite topic: the neighbor boy. She worships him! ;)
Me: Did Parker come over today?
Ellie: Yes
Me: Did Parker give you food and water?
Ellie: Yes

To make sure she wasn't just saying yes for forever, I asked a few questions I knew were "No":
Me: Did Parker take you outside?
Ellie: No
Me: Did Parker make pancakes?
Ellie: No

So, she was paying attention, and also tattling on her babysitter! >_<
Me: Did Parker play with you?
Ellie: Yes
Me: Do you like Parker?
Ellie: Yes

The next question is always a gamble. When I've been gone a long time, or overnight, she usually tells me she doesn't like me. But she usually also agrees that, even if she doesn't like me, I like her.
Me: Do you like Mom?
Ellie: No
Me: Does Mom like you?
Ellie: No

I laughed, and said: "YES I DO! Mom likes Ellie!!!" Pick the "Yes" card!!
Ellie: Yes
Me: Do you like Mom?
Ellie: No

She's such a stormy and dramatic little bugger!

Now that we were warmed up, I brought up the test subject, and tried to mix it up with other things she does like--namely, classical music right now.
Me: Do you like CVC?
Ellie: No
Me: Do you like Bach?
Ellie: Yes (Bach is her first Baroque love - the Brandenburg Concerto)
Me: Do you like Pachelbel?
Ellie: No
Me: Do you like Brandenburg Concerto?
Ellie: Yes
Me: Do you like Canon in D?
Ellie: No
Me: Do you like CVC? (Trying to test her; she's not to be fooled.)
Ellie: No

So, I suppose the research CVC test is out for now. I met with the collaborating researcher last night for dinner, and she wasn't too dismayed. She said, "The fact that Ellie is more strongly reinforced by challenge--tough books--than treats is incredible. Nobody's ever communicated with a bird on this level!" So... we'll keep working at it!

Anyway, at the end of our learning session, I asked her, "Do you like Mom?" She responded, "Yes." :)